Was that seat hot or what? I feel like a Whopper. Turn me over, I'm done and ready.
Funny enough, I was just talking to my friend about that. Our speedometer has melted and as a result it's very hard to see with any degree of accuracy exactly how fast we were going.
We'd have more luck playing pick-up sticks with our butt-cheeks than we will getting a flight out of here before daybreak.
If they told you wolverines would make good house pets, would you believe them?
You're the guy who tried to get my cab. I knew I knew you! You scared the bejesus out of me. Come to think of it it was easy to get a cab during rush hour.
Oh, he's drunk. How would he know where we are going?
I've got two dollars... and a Casio.
You could've killed me slugging me in the gut like that. That's how Houdini died, you know.
Love... is not a big enough word. It's not a big enough word for how I feel about my wife.
Yeah, but by the time the airline cancels this flight, which they will sooner or later, you'd have more of a chance to find a three-legged ballerina than you would a hotel room.
Why are you holding my hand?.......between two pillows!
We had a small fire last night, but we caught it in the nick of time.
I can't forget it. I am sorry. I had no idea it was your cab. Let me make it up to you. How about a nice hot dog and a beer. just a hot dog then. some coffee? Milk? Soda? Tea? Lifesavers? Slurpee?
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